Not all children find friendships easy. Children may find it difficult to make new friends, keep new friends or find it hard to break away from peers they are not so keen on any more. I have covered off various issues regarding friends in other blog posts. This one focuses on if your child is having difficulties maintaining friendships. I find that many children like to make new friends and find it easy but when it comes to keeping them they find it more challenging. There are things you can do to help. You can check out that your children are doing the right things.
1. Are they being friendly?
2. Do they ask friends questions about the things that are important to them?
3. Do they help others if they need help?
4. Are they dependable and reliable?
5. Are they talking kindly about their friends to other friends?
6. Are they making friends with people who are the same and different to them? It can be fun to have friends who like to do the things as them but it can also be fun to learn about something new.
What advice would you give your child to help with their friendships?
These are all excellent suggestions! I think helping children develop empathy toward others is a key to a child becoming a true friend, and thus enjoying many friendships. A book that can assist in discovering this is the Kelly Bear Feelings book.
Thank you Leah for the comment and suggestion to your book. There are lots of great resources out there to help children with their friendships. We spend so much time with our friends that we need to ‘get’ them.
Now that my girls are 5 and 8 we have had our share of issues. The bottom line is to treat others as you would want to be treated yourself. Use your words to communicate how you feel. If there is a friendship that continues to be hurtful, we suggest playing with friends who make you feel good. There is a book we have read called “have you filled your bucket today”, and that was helpful.
Great advice Nina. It is tricky when their are friends around who don’t treat your children as well as they could. I have a whole chapter on friendships in the book because it is such an important subject. Thank you.
As a teacher I can share that staying out of trouble with the teacher is a great way to make friends. Even Kindergarteners stay away from children who get in trouble a lot for poor choices.
Stephanie I can see what you mean. Many children do not want to be friends with someone that gets into trouble and they do want to please the teacher. When I look at both my children they have good friendships because they of this reason. They tell me they don’t want to be friends with children who get into trouble. Thank you for your comment.
good reminder here my friend! we are in the middle of a big relocation…great info to help my kids make friends.
Wow good luck with the relocation. It can be quite tricky to start all over again. Thank you Chris.