Every person has a different story to tell. We all have different experiences that have got us to where we are now in our life. Children are the same and have their own story. They have their own experiences that have got them to where they are now. They may only be in primary school or secondary school, but those experiences have been a contributing factor to the way that children behave, interact and influences their beliefs and values. #
Children don’t tend to know other peoples stories. Sharing that level of detail and background requires a huge amount of trust, which is more likely to happen among adults. Children don’t tend to share too much about their journey and story and probably don’t even understand how their story influences the way that they are.
How Our Stories Affect Behaviour
It is really important that children know that every friend or classmate will have a different story. Even though they don’t know what it is, they should still be kind and maybe a bit more understanding, patient, forgiving, generous etc because they don’t know the home life that their friends have had/are living. When children have a happy home life and/or no personal problems, they may not be aware that other children don’t have the same experience and are just doing their best to get by every day.
Remind them when they have issues with other children in their class/year group that there is a story behind how that person is behaving. It may seem frustrating and difficult but there could be a good reason for the behaviour and there is nothing they can do to change that person. They are who they are because of their life experiences – good and bad.
They need to work with the other child rather than against them and find a way of managing that relationship. Talk to your child about possible strategies for dealing with other children’s difficult or annoying behaviour, whilst still having some empathy towards others.