Is There More To A Defiant Child?

February 20, 2010 | My Blog | The Kids Coach | 0 Comment

I was inspired to write this blog after two chance conversations with parents about their defiant children. One was a parent who believes their child has a disorder called Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) and the other parent thinks that their childs defiance is just part of who are and they will grow out of it – they hope. The latters child simply refuses to do anything that they ask them to do unless they are coerced just like my soon to be 3 year old.

I have been thinking about both sets of people, their children and my son. All the children are under the age of five and I wonder if it is possible to tell if a child has a disorder such as this one at such a young age. Especially since other disorders are recognised when children are slightly older. Most parents would see their strong willed child as the person they are and expect their child to be pushing the boundaries, so what makes one mum think differently. A mum who has done her research and discovered that defiance is not as simple as it seems.

That mum recognises that their childs ‘defiant’ behaviour as not being the norm because:

It is more persistent
Has lasted more than six months; and
Their child is disruptive to their family, home and school environment

Children with ODD also show signs of negativity, disobedience and can be hostile to towards authority figures. They may also show consistent signs of:

Temper tantrums
Be argumentative with adults
Refuse to comply with adult requests or rules
Deliberately annoy other people
Blame others for mistakes or their misbehavior
Act touchy and become easily annoyed
Show anger and resentment
Be spiteful
Aggressive towards peers
Find it difficult to maintain friendships

I had not heard of ODD before I spoke to this mum. ODD seems to be much more recognised in the US and almost unheard of here. If you have a defiant child who shows these symptoms and you think there is more to it, it is worth getting them checked out as early invention can prevent greater problems.