It can be very tough parenting an argumentative child. Whatever you say to them they do not want to hear it. They don’t want to agree to your instruction. They will oppose whatever your thoughts are when you try and have a discussion with them. It can be stressful. It is very easy to say ‘Why don’t you just listen to me?’ but it does not help the situation. Your child will still not comply. Why should they listen to you? What do you know? (Take that last bit tongue in cheek but it can be how children think). So what can you do instead of pulling your hair out and how can you parent an argumentative child?
Strategies For Dealing With An Argumentative Child
- Notice and praise your child for having an opinion. It is good that they have their own thoughts about what they want to do and when they want to do it.
- Look at your whole child and the other more positive traits they have. Don’t think of them as only being oppositional or argumentative.
- Think about what your child is receptive to in terms of language and use phrases that will make them listen to what you are asking of them.
- Cut your loses. Don’t get into full scale arguments with them. It makes matters worse and then punishments and consequences get thrown around that are unrealistic.
- You can offer them choices in terms of how something is done when you instruct them to do a task.
- Recognise when they have listened to you and done something the first or second time you asked. Verbalise it to them. Tell them that you are pleased that they listened and acted.
Do you have an argumentative child? I’d love to know if these tips worked for you or whether you have a tip you’d like to share. Leave a comment here or via my social media feeds. In addition I found some more strategies for you.
If you are finding your argumentative child a bit too much why not try some coaching with me so that they can think and adjust their behaviour accordingly.
