We can all shout. Parents shout because their children are not listening or not doing something that they asked or expected them to do. Maybe they are misbehaving. Children shout at parents because they think they aren’t listening, are being unreasonable or uncooperative. They shout at their siblings because they invade their privacy, take their toys or because they want the TV remote control.
There are lots of reasons why parents shout and why our children shout at each other and at us. Shouting leads to anger and generally, some consequences. It is never a nice family atmosphere where there is shouting, so how can we all stop?
Tips for a Less Shouty Household
If parents want a less shouty household, they need to find out why it’s happening and address each problem associated with it. Here’s how:
- Make a list of all those things that you don’t feel that you are getting from your children.
- Get children to do the same for their parents.
- Get your children to make a list between themselves of why they shout at each other.
- Go through each issue on the list and find a solution that you could try out. You have to try it out to know it works, as the idea you thought might work may not, which means going back to the drawing board at a later time.
This process helps to get the issues that result in shouting out in the open. You should be able to recognise patterns of behaviour that cause the shouting or make it worse. This self-awareness of the problems will help your family to explore what solutions would work best in certain situations.
- Maybe it is going into the room where the person you want to speak to is sitting, then talk to them, rather than shouting from another room.
- Maybe it is about using different language to get the members of your family to do something you want or need them to do.
- It might mean rewriting the rules of the house and having them up in the kitchen so that everyone can see and follow them.
Make it clear what the alternatives to shouting are, and remember, the shouting could be the result of not talking enough about a bad day at school or something as simple as a hungry tummy.
There are many reasons to shout, but everyone in the family should learn how to curb the need to do so and stop shouting for a happier home life.
If you need some help with dealing with shouting in your house or would like your child to be more cooperative with you, please call me and we can chat about how I can help. One coaching session may be all it takes to resolve this issue.
Try My Sticker Chart to Improve Family Harmony
The Contributions Board is a sticker chart with a difference! It’s been designed to help families work as a team and appreciate the efforts of the other ‘team members’.
When everyone is working together there tends to be less shouting and both parents and children gain more understanding about other family members through increased communication and helping each other.
Read more about The Contributions Board
