two teenage girl friends

Your child won’t have a great day at school every day. Some days their friends may say something to them that was unkind, that they may not have thought through but said not intending to offend. Some days their friend may do something to intentionally to hurt your child. A peer may say something hurtful to them and really mean it. Whichever the scenario,  your child may feel hurt and upset. They may feel that they aren’t a good friend anymore and you may get emotional when friends upset your child. So how can we help them?

When Friends Upset Your Child Strategies

  • Remind them they are still a good friend. Remind them by getting them to list all the wonderful qualities they have to offer. They really need to believe that they have these qualities and that self-belief they are amazing.
  • You need to make your child aware that what one person says to them does not mean everyone else feels or thinks the same about them. They need to isolate those feelings around that one person only.
  • You need to encourage them to be their authentic self and continue with their friendships. Make sure they don’t change anything about them but keep on being them.
  • Tell them that their real friends will take no notice of what the peer said. If they are really good friends then they won’t listen to other friends outside of their friendship group.
  • They need to keep putting themselves out there and let their peers get to see the good person that they are.

If your child let’s an unkind word affect how they feel and withdraws from their friends because of it they will be bringing loneliness and segregation on themselves. I doubt they want that, so keep encouraging them to try and deal with problems as they arise.