Sometimes at school, there’s a person in your child’s year group that a lot of people don’t like. They may not have done or said anything to your child, so they have no reason to dislike them. But friends are telling them not to talk to or be friends with the unpopular child. Their friends may just not like them, or have a good reason not to. But does that mean your child should behave in the same way?
It can be really difficult for your child to go against what their peers are doing. They may not like your child interacting with the ‘no one likes them’ person. But isn’t it better to be kind and fair rather than follow the crowd without good reason?
Help Your Child Interact with Unpopular Kids
If your child does find themselves in this awkward situation at school or social life, parents can have a chat and give them some tips on what they could do…
1. Think For Themselves
They could ask themselves, ‘Why don’t people like this person?’ Is it something they’ve seen for themselves or just what others are saying? We can’t always rely on others’ opinions and join them when they fall out with someone. Everyone deserves a chance to show who they really are.
2. Be Friendly, Not Fake
They could still smile at them or say ‘Hi’. Small acts of kindness show that they see them as a person.
3. Listen Without Judging
If your child talks to the alienated peer and tells them why they are being isolated, get them to listen with an open mind. Maybe the kid has been misunderstood, or they have made mistakes – everyone does. Giving someone a chance to explain can change how they see them, even if they don’t want to befriend them.
4. Be Brave
It takes courage to go against a peer group, but being kind doesn’t mean they are picking sides or causing drama. It just means they are thinking for themselves and making an effort. There is no reason why they can’t talk to that person. They just need to be brave.
5. Talk To A Trusted Adult
If they are unsure what to do or are feeling the peer pressure from others to stay away from that child, they can talk to a teacher or a school counsellor. They will help them figure out what the right thing to do is.
Any child in this situation has a choice. They don’t have to do what everyone else is doing. They can choose kindness. They can choose to give someone a chance. They can be fair, kind, and strong.
Get More Help With Tricky Friendship Dynamics
If your child is struggling with any tricky friendship dynamics, please get in touch with me to talk about life coaching for children on 07961 312 749 or complete my contact form
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