Blackboard with Time To Reinvent Yourself written on it

Reinventing yourself is sometimes needed when things go a bit wrong and you realise that you have to change something about you or something you are doing in order to get things back on track. For example, when it comes to friendships reinvention of your children’s behaviour may be needed, in order to recover from the fallout. They may have upset someone by saying something stupid or been thoughtless towards them. They could have told a lie that affects their peers and their lives. These actions will affect how others feel about them. When they do or say something that has repercussions it can affect their friendships, causing them to fall apart. They then regret what they’ve done and want to take it back. They want those children to forget it happened and go back to how life was. But it’s too late.

When this happens, there are two main ways that children can redeem themselves.

Reinventing Yourself Through Actions and Attitude

  1. They can apologise and hope the other child saw that a mistake was made. The other child might say they forgive them but the trust isn’t as it was before. The other child may be cautious of what they say and how they interact with the child going forward. It will take for them to trust your child again. 
  2. Your child can choose to completely reinvent themselves. By that I mean they really start to make amends by changing their attitude, choosing their words more carefully, and being kinder in their interactions with friends. They can show that they can be a good friend, that they are sorry, and are no longer the same person. As part of their reinvention, their friends get to see a different side to them. A softer, more caring side. The authentic person they are.

I have seen several children in my coaching practice where reinvention has been needed. The child who made the mistake was able to keep with that friendship group due to the changes they made – that commitment to their reinvention.

If they value their friends and can admit to making a mistake,  reinvention is highly recommended and does work.