girls making a promiseSome children want to solve their friends problems and get involved in making sure everyone is happy and content. This is especially true when it comes to friendships. They want everyone to get along with each other and when there is an argument they will get involved as the peacemaker and try to rectify the situation. It is a wonderful trait to have but often this child spends too much of their time making sure everyone else is happy rather than focusing on their own friendships (which may have issues of their own).

So do we want to change our child from being this kind, caring soul and investing too much time into others friendships? 

I think if your child is happy in their friendship group then of course be pleased that they want to get involved, (so long as it is in a progressive, wanted and in a diplomatic way). If they aren’t then I think they need to start making their own group work and putting their good conflict resolution tactics into practice there. Friendships take a lot of time and grown and nurture and if they are not concentrating on their own group of friends then there friendships may dwindle and fall apart.

Solving Friends Problems Can Build Better Friendships For Themselves

Talk to them about the skills they are using with other people and the words of advice they are giving others. Get them to see how they could use similar words in their own friendships to make them stronger, better, happier. They are doing it already in other peoples friendships so it should work, They may be unsure of sorting their own friendships out because they don’t want to harm them but if their friendships are making them unhappy there is only one thing to do and that is for them to address the situation and start to change it for the better.

Is your child a peacemaker and problem solver?

All children need to be able to solve problems. If you find your child could do with some help with problem-solving skills please get in touch.