Parents don’t find it easy to talk about difficult subjects with their children. Subjects that may upset a child, worry them or give them new information to digest. These could be tricky subjects, such as parents separating, someone passing away, mental health issues or illness. Most parents don’t know where to start when it comes to broaching tricky subjects, and if you are one of those parents who is unsure of what to say and how to say it, these tips may come in useful.
Tips for Dealing with Challenging Topics
Start to have the conversation you need to have with your child early – possibly before it happens. For example, if you know that a grandparent is not well, tell your child rather than leave it until the grandparent is really ill and is not going to make it. Your child will be more likely to accept the situation and understand what is going on and why.
Don’t always wait for your child to notice something is going on. Initiate the conversation with your child and when you do, be honest with them. There is no benefit to lying. I am not saying tell them everything, but tell them everything you think they need to know, given their age and their understanding. For example, your child is going to learn about sex education at school. As a parent, you may want them to hear a bit about it before they learn it at school.
Talk to them when they are relaxed and use everyday opportunities to talk. Good times to talk are when there is less rushing about. You know when the best times are.
Once you have said what you wanted to let them ask questions and listen to what they want to say. They may ask you lots more questions and if they do, keep on answering them. Be patient if the questions are repetitive and if at a later stage they come back and ask you more questions, or the same ones again.
Share with your children your thoughts and feelings on the subject so they know what your values are, if it is relevant to the subject you are discussing. This can relate to subjects such as cyber-bullying, death, illness, drugs etc.
Finally, tread carefully. You may not get the response you expected when talking to your child about difficult subjects, so be open-minded. They may be embarrassed, scared or just reluctant to have the conversation. Be patient, be kind and ready to challenge your own views!
Resources to Improve Parent/Child Communication
How have you dealt with talking about difficult subjects with your children? For more reading on having conversations with your child grab a copy of, ‘The Parent’s Toolkit’
Read: Telling Mum and Dad: Encourage Open Communication with Your Child
Read: Calming Overwhelm
Alternatively, pick up the phone and we can have a chat about how I can work with your child directly as a specialist life coach for children and teens.. My phone number is 07961 312 749.
[Published November 2022 | Updated March 2026]
