Teenagers – Managing Their Own Expectations

One of the most valuable skills parents can teach teenagers is managing their expectations. Life doesn’t always run smoothly, and learning to anticipate what’s likely to happen in a situation and accept it can help them deal with what is ahead.

For example, when your teenager goes on a school trip. Trips are exciting, social and full of memories in the making, but they are also chaotic, tiring and full of late nights. If your teenager knows in advance that they probably won’t get much sleep, it will help ease their anxiety and they will be able to be more relaxed about the situation. Accepting that it will be a loud, exhausting few days will make it easier for them to go with the flow instead of worrying about how tired they are while on the trip.

How to Help Teens Prepare for Different Situations

The same goes for when they go on holiday and long-haul flights (with or without their family). They will be excited about a big trip, but they need to be realistic. There’s a good chance they won’t sleep much on the plane and when they land, they will feel groggy, out of sync and just want to crawl into bed — but they need to stay awake. Help your teenager understand that jet lag is part of the holiday and they need to be mentally strong to get through it until it’s time for bed. It is something we all struggle with, so convey this to your child. They are not the exception to this experience.

Exam season is also a difficult time for teenagers managing their own expectations. Their sleep might suffer, their eating habits may not be as good as usual and they may not be able to socialise much. If they can expect these disruptions and accept them as temporary, it will reduce their stress and they have enough of that already. They need to expect this to happen so they are ready for it.

These are just some of the situations that come to mind that teenagers will face as they become more independent. As adults, we have experience with these situations, but for our teenagers this may be new territory. By helping our teenagers recognise and accept what’s likely to happen, we’re giving them a head start in learning how to manage life’s tricky situations and know how to deal with them both emotionally and mentally.