We can’t rely on other people to do things for us. We can’t rely on them to build us up, to notice when we need cheering up or to recognise if we have a problem. If we rely on others too much then we can easily get let down by them, then we feel disappointed and often frustrated by them.
We all have experience of asking someone to help us and they forget or they just make excuses and don’t help. We wait for them but it does not happen. It’s very disappointing, particularly if you always try to help other people. We have to be responsible and learn to rely on ourselves – not for everything, but if we want to get something done, we need to do it ourselves. We can’t rely on others to fix our problems, make us feel better or make decisions for us. We need to do that for ourselves, in the best way that we can.
ENCOURAGING RESPONSIBILITY
Ideally, parents should teach their children to be self-sufficient and to get on with things themselves. They should do whatever they can for themselves and be responsible for their feelings. They should also find a way to fix their own problems and be able to get over bumps in the road.
I am not saying they should never ask for help, but get your children to see that not everyone around them will be willing, or have the time, to help them. There may be many good reasons for this. Maybe they have a lot going on in their own life and don’t have the mental energy to get involved with someone else’s problems.
Learning to rely on yourself is an essential life skill and promotes independence and personal growth. Give your children the tools to be able to stand on their own two feet and grow into the young people parents want.
I often do life coaching sessions on helping a child to be more responsible and independent and taking gradual steps towards that. If you would be interested in me doing the same for your child, then please get in touch.
