Most children have a parent or guardian – someone they live with that has their needs at the forefront of their mind. Children don’t always see the value of their parents unless they are doing something for them and they are going to benefit from something that their grown-up is doing for them.
Parents and guardians are invaluable as they have so much wisdom and experience to share and they are always ready to lend a helping hand in times of need. Parents need to remind children of their role. They need to vocalise that this is their job. Children need to see that parents are not there to ask for money all the time or to give them lifts to places. They are supportive parents.
The Qualities of Supportive Parents
Many children do not think about how their parents can support them. I have noticed this in my coaching practice when we talk about things they are struggling with and how their parents could help – emotionally and practically. However, supportive parents will do most of the following things:
- Be a steady presence throughout a child’s life and their ups and downs. This support should make their child feel that they are never alone and always have someone they can talk to.
- Often have a different perspective from their child and they can shed light on complex situations and offer solutions that they may have not thought about. This is a huge benefit.
- Have the experience that children do not have yet and know so much more about the world than children do. Children can learn so much from an older person’s experiences if they are willing to listen.
- Often not judge their children and the decisions they make. They are their cheerleader and not there to knock them down.
- Be able to impart their knowledge to their children. And they have so much knowledge.
For the reasons listed above children need to cherish the value of their parents. They are not just figures in their lives but supporters, love givers and problem-solvers. If your child has forgotten about all the roles you have, remind them of these ones so they can rely on you for guidance and advice. They should not dismiss the life skills you can bring to their lives, but see the value.
If you would like some more information on helping your child be the best they can be, see how life coaching could benefit them. The Parent’s Toolkit could also help.
